What does it mean to be Popular – Socially Competent?
Here are 6 tips for overcoming Social Shortcomings online.
- Friendly/Thoughtful - Do you show interest and goodwill? Are you serving a beneficial and helpful purpose? Are you attentive, considerate and kind? There is a fine line between the amount and type of interest. Thinking of others – is showing concern for the needs and feelings of others; expressing your interest in their lives. Too much interest and the areas of interest – may actually turn someone away, when what your looking for is to attract them.
- Sensitive – Initiating conversation is not always easy. If one easily takes offence, or is highly responsive and easily emotionally triggered -the individually can be difficult to engage with. It takes practice and conversation. Don’t let, not knowing how a seemingly innocent comment might be received, stop you from reaching out to people. What is important is that you do not intend to offend. (Well unless you do – if you intend to be on the edge of subject matters, a disclaimer “I may offend you” may be in order.)
- Caring/Helpful - Understanding how people think and feel – not always easy. However you can offer service and assistance. How do you show concern for other people? Someone having a bad day or stuck in a situation unfamiliar to them – is often receptive to “Hi! I’m here if you need to chat”. It’s nice to know we are not alone.
- Fun to Be Around – Qualities of Fun People are they Make Eye Contact, Are Active and Curious, They Listen, Smile, Laugh, Play, Enjoy, Initiate Conversation Easily; They Care about Themselves and are often Spontaneous. Embrace what makes you different (weird or strange) and have fun with it.
- Knowing how to interpret and respond – There are visual signals, gestures and facial expressions in one to one engagement that not seen online. However, there are written and expression styles online. When you get to know people on a deeper level these become easier to read.
- Conversation Control – The level of engagement that exists in a conversation is determined by an equal level of exchange. There are situations when emotions take over control and the conversation becomes more one sided than an equal exchange.
Determining what gets your conversation time and why is very important online.
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